


She's So Pretty (It Hurts)

by orphan_account



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Acceptance, Comfort, Coming Out, Confessions, Friendship/Love, Gen, Lesbian Character, Self-Acceptance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:07:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24137860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: "She wants Shimizu to be the one she tells. It only seems right, considering how she practically fell for her the moment she saw her. But it's more than that. Shimizu is gentle, and understanding. She is nurturing."Yachi comes out to Shimizu.
Relationships: Shimizu Kiyoko & Yachi Hitoka
Kudos: 18





	She's So Pretty (It Hurts)

Yachi heads to the gym early. She wants to get there before the team arrives for practice, before Shimizu even - she needs a moment to center herself before Shimizu arrives. Yachi realizes that she has never been in an empty gym before, once she gets there. She rolls the volleyball cart out and, for lack of anything better to do, she finds a rag and starts cleaning the volleyballs. Cleaning the volleyballs is never really a concern, but they _are_ actually quite dirty, Yachi notes. She wipes a layer of dirt off the ball in her hands, and reveals a bright strip of white surrounded by grime. 

She breathes. _This isn't a big deal_ , she tells herself. _For the most part, it's just like any other practice._

Yachi doesn't quite know why she feels she _needs_ to tell someone this. But she does. She just doesn't feel like herself, knowing the world may see her so differently. And she wants Shimizu to be the one she tells. It only seems right, considering how she practically fell for her the moment she saw her. But it's more than that. Shimizu is gentle, and understanding, and her and Yachi have formed a nurturing bond. 

"Look at you," Yachi hears, and she turns to the sound of Shimizu's voice. "Our manager cares even more than the players."

Yachi's heart skips a beat. But Shimizu smiles, and in that smile Yachi sees safety. She feels that she can trust Shimizu, turn to her for support. Even if she does still make her flush at times - she can't help it. 

Being vulnerable is hard, but Shimizu is someone Yachi is willing to be vulnerable with. She _wants_ to be vulnerable with her, she wants Shimizu to know a true and open Yachi. 

Yachi grins back at Shimizu. "Well, the team deserves it. They work so hard."

Shimizu nods. She joins Yachi at the volleyball cart, places a light hand on the handle. "You're right. You've worked hard too, though. You've really dedicated yourself to this team." She smiles with soft pride. 

There Yachi goes, her cheeks warming just a little. She smiles at the floor for a moment. "Shimizu, do you remember when you first spoke to me about the manager position?"

"Of course."

Yachi looks back up, into Shimizu's kind eyes. Her heart beats in her chest. She had been waiting for the perfect moment to get this out casually. It quickly became clear, though, that that _perfect_ moment she was imagining would never really come, or she would never actually seize it. So Yachi had grit her teeth and decided to be brave, to make it happen. That's why she came to the gym early today, her intentions playing on repeat in her mind. 

But now it seems like she might be able to make it somewhat natural. Even if she has to steer the conversation a little. 

"Gosh, I really overwhelmed you with so much information," Shimizu is saying. "The look on your face…" she trails off with a chuckle. 

Yachi chuckles too, the two girls' voices mingling and then fading. 

A pause.

"Uh - well," Yachi hears herself start. "I was a bit overwhelmed with all the volleyball talk, yeah. But I also just… I found you really pretty. I mean, I still do, of course…"

"Thank you, Yachi." Shimizu tilts her head in a way that just makes Yachi want to stare at her for a very long time. "You're really pretty too."

"Oh… um, what I mean is - " Yachi's cheeks are burning by now, and her eyes return to the ground. "I was attracted to you, Shimizu...and I, um, I'm attracted to other girls, too, generally." 

"Oh," Yachi hears Shimizu say softly. She also hears two people come in, and she can't help but snap her head to the door - but it's just Hinata and Kageyama. If anyone overhears, she doesn't mind if it's them. She thinks she might want to tell Hinata anyway. 

"And I just don't feel the same way about boys," Yachi finishes. 

"Okay," Shimizu says, perhaps thoughtfully. 

Yachi is staring at the floor, her stomach feeling all over the place and her heart beating wildly. Shimizu lifts her chin with her palm, and Yachi finds herself looking into a deeply proud smile, loving eyes. She melts into it for a moment, sighing her butterflies out into a wide smile and happy eyebrows. 

But then the awkwardness comes crashing down on her as she stares into Shimizu's eyes. "I'm sorry," she glances away. "I know it doesn't matter very much. And - and I just wanted you to know about me. This doesn't have to change our relationship. I don't want it to, really."

Perhaps part of the reason it felt so important for Yachi to tell Shimizu came from a buried, nagging guilt about how she feels about her. She's seen the way Tanaka and Nishinoya act around her, and how she responds. She doesn't want Shimizu to see her the way she sees them. 

"Yachi, of course not," Shimizu grasps Yachi's shoulder, and their eyes meet again. "I'm glad you felt you could share this with me. Don't… please don't ever apologize for allowing yourself to be you within the world, okay?"

Shimizu's eyes are so full and genuine and warm. "Okay," Yachi whispers, feeling a sudden wave of emotion and tears welling up. She doesn't bother to keep them in, and when a year rolls down her cheek, Shimizu stops it with her finger.

More players have started filing in now, but Yachi doesn't even care anymore. 

"To be honest, I… I still sometimes wonder about me. " Shimizu says as she wipes Yachi's sparse tears. "You're brave. I'm proud of you, and I admire you."

Yachi blinks, taken aback. Shimizu, proud of her? She _admires_ her? Yachi is the one who looks so highly upon Shimizu, she sees her as a planet above the solar system. She never imagined that she could have such a positive impact on Shimizu, that she even meant something similar to her at all. 

"Oh, wow," Yachi breathes. "Thank you, Shimizu."

She is a little in awe.

Shimizu smooths Yachi's hair, looking at her young face. Then she pulls her into a hug, and Shimizu is so warm and softly solid and _comforting -_ Yachi feels full. 

"I'm glad I know you better now," Shimizu says into Yachi. 

Yachi smiles, breathing into Shimizu. She is glad she knows her better now too. The world, even, knows her a little better now. And it feels so, _so_ good. 


End file.
